September 29, 2023

About three months into a brand new relationship, on Valentine’s Day, Leighton couldn’t sleep due to a horrible chilly.  At about 2 am she took no matter chilly meds she may discover as a result of she was determined to sleep.  At about 5 am, she wakened once more and threw up.  She assumed it was from taking a number of meds that had been partially expired, so she determined she would simply sleep in till work at midday and was certain she’d really feel higher then.  When she didn’t really feel any higher at work, she grabbed an outdated being pregnant take a look at from the automotive simply to make certain, and was shocked to see a blazing optimistic 3 minutes later.

Whereas the being pregnant was principally uneventful well being clever, it didn’t begin out that means.  At 7 weeks, Leighton wakened round 4 am in a pool of blood.  The ER referred to as it a threatened miscarriage, gave a 50/50 likelihood for persevering with a wholesome being pregnant, ordered pelvic relaxation, and instructed her to name the OB instantly to be seen.  The OB mentioned they didn’t must see her for five extra weeks, and when she lastly went they mentioned it was a subchorionic hematoma that was no massive deal in anyway and by no means required pelvic relaxation.  Whereas the SCH healed completely positive, the connection by no means recovered sexually.  Leighton blamed herself and her physique.

Leighton’s accomplice on the time was in a police academy, and was solely granted someday off for the beginning of the child.  Her household lived two states away as nicely, so her OB agreed to an elective induction after her due date to permit for as a lot assist as potential.  Leighton wished her accomplice, mother, and her grandmother along with her for the beginning.  He constantly argued that it wasn’t honest to additionally embrace his mom. This was the start of being uncertain of what selections Leighton was allowed to make for herself.

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At 39 weeks, Leighton’s common OB was unexpectedly out of city, so she noticed a midwife as a substitute.  The midwife scoffed at Leighton’s request to be checked, however she did it anyway and mentioned she was solely possibly a fingertip if she was being beneficiant.  She went on to lecture Leighton concerning the potential penalties of an elective induction and epidural.  Once more, Leighton already felt very unstable in her means to make selections, so this made her really feel like she was being egocentric as a substitute of being mother.

On October 24, Leighton had contractions for 3 hours along with her mother.  When she left for the hospital along with her accomplice, they slowed down and finally stopped.  The subsequent day was her final prenatal appointment, and the OB scheduled her for induction that night time at 8pm.  

They arrived on the hospital at 8pm, and Leighton was given Cytotec round 9pm.  Her mother-in-law confirmed up just about instantly, however promised to go away come push time.  They began Pitocin at about 10:30pm, and shortly after contractions acquired very intense.  She acquired an epidural at about 12am and slept till 7am when she woke as much as strain.  The midwife on name was the identical midwife from the 39 week appointment, and Leighton knew shift change was at 7am so she purposely stayed quiet till the brand new midwife got here in.  They weren’t doing any checks as a result of Leighton’s water had damaged earlier within the night time, however the strain feeling was constructing.  At about 9am, the brand new midwife got here in to examine and mentioned she discovered child’s head as a substitute, so she began pushing.  After quarter-hour of pushing, Selah was born.  Leighton instantly thought she was stunning, but in addition that she didn’t look proper.  Leighton and her accomplice expressed issues over her lack of motion or crying and the royal blue shade of her pores and skin upwards of eight occasions earlier than being taken critically.  The NICU crew rushed in, as did her mother-in-law whereas Leighton was in stirrups ready on placenta and stitches.  Dad and mother-in-law went with child to the NICU.  

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The placenta and stitches took about 45 minutes, and on the hour mark the nurses demanded Leighton rise up and use the lavatory as a result of they “wanted the mattress.” She insisted she wasn’t prepared and was nonetheless pretty numb, however they grabbed her arms and pulled her up anyway.  Within the lavatory, she fainted.  She wakened possibly 2 hours later feeling enraged, however uncertain who to direct it to.  After 5 hours, mother-in-law was lastly advised to go away the NICU in order that Leighton may see her child.  Upon arriving, she was knowledgeable that Selah had loads of fluid in a single lung and wanted assist respiratory.

For 4 days, she went to most feedings to nurse.  On day two, the hallways had been closed so that they had been about 5 minutes late to feed.  The nurse had already fed Selah formulation, and he or she scolded them for being late and requested that they didn’t maintain the child.  On the subsequent feed, Leighton nursed and the nurse smacked Selah’s hand away from her cheek.  After this, Leighton cried to the cost nurse about getting a brand new nurse for the child.  The identical midwife that hadn’t been very good was again, and when she got here to examine on Leighton she broke down and advised her concerning the nurse as nicely.  The subsequent morning, the midwife insisted they’d have the ability to keep till 8 pm the next night time and that she would be sure that the problems within the NICU had been taken care of.  Not even half-hour later, Leighton was given discharge papers and advised they needed to be out in half-hour and that the midwife had no authority to offer us that info.

As soon as they had been all house,  Leighton began actually feeling the impact of sitting upright in a hospital chair on the NICU for therefore lengthy.  She went again to the physician for the ache, and was advised there was a problem with how issues healed however that it shouldn’t be painful.  Getting Selah off formulation was tough, however she did it by 6 weeks.  On the 6 week appointment, she was recognized with a labial fusion that needed to be lower with a scalpel in workplace.

Dad constantly fell asleep whereas feeding the child, so Leighton did it alone.  Quickly she realized that he additionally fell asleep whereas “watching” her so Leighton may sleep, so she stopped doing that too.  He refused to maintain the child so she may attend her school lessons.  Leighton sleep educated Selah at 4 months, and by chance it caught rather well.  Sadly, at this level the abuse ramped up.  The earlier sexual points led to rape incidents, he pointed weapons at Leighton and the child, and refused to take part as a dad or mum.  They broke up when Selah was 9 months outdated, and custody battles ensued.  

Two years later, the identical OB workplace did not report Leighton’s chlamydia take a look at outcomes to her for over a 12 months.

At Selah’s 3 12 months wellcheck, they discovered a coronary heart murmur.  It was finally recognized as an atrial septal defect that she was born with and had simply been discovered.  Leighton took her out of state for therapy, which was an crucial resolution for Selah’s sake. Join with Leighton at @leighte01 on Instagram.

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Ergobaby

This episode is sponsored by Ergobaby. Based in 2003, Ergobaby has pioneered the gold normal for comfy, ergonomic smooth structured carriers. Their dedication to offering mother and father with the inspiration to thrive has launched the corporate into making a broad vary of award-winning merchandise that match into households’ each day lives seamlessly, comfortably, and safely – the place perform and high quality usually are not compromised. In 2020, they launched Everlove by Ergobaby, a primary of its type child service purchase again and resale program, a sustainability effort to assist households and the planet. Try Ergobaby’s Embrace in Soft Air Mesh and new Evolve 3-in-1 Bouncer that we mentioned on the podcast!